My new obsession

My first attempt at a parenting post - Giving the gift of calm

I’ve never been a Mommy to a two year old before, so I certainly understand that I don’t have all the answers when it comes to parenting. One thing I am very grateful for is a husband who is a team member with me. We don’t always agree on everything, but we’re always able to support each other, discuss our differences, and come up with what we feel is best for Ian and for our family.

One thing both of us have learned during these two years is that nothing can be hard and fast when it comes to raising a child. Ian is an independent, strong willed, amazing little person. There are certain things we don’t falter on, like Ian’s safety, that there will be no hitting each other or trying to rip out the dog’s legs, but there are many, many things we’ve learned to be flexible about.

Last week we had a wonderful service at church, the Hanging of the Greens. It was fun to be there to celebrate with our congregation, other Mennonite congregations from the Denver metro, and many other guests. By the time we were ready to leave it was around nine o’clock, well passed a certain someone’s bedtime. He was sitting in the Nursery, being rocked by his favorite caretaker there. He was holding a choo-choo in his hands, and instead of making him put it back, I chose to let him take it home. That was a battle I was not going to fight. Yes Ian needs to learn that he can’t have everything he wants, and that you can’t take things that aren’t yours, but not when he’s two years old and exhausted. We took it back to church this past Sunday and picked one other toy we could borrow.

On the way home that night, John said it has taken him awhile to figure out that he has to choose his battles. I think it’s a lesson all parents need to learn. I think one of the most important things is to remain consistent, which is easier said then done.

We shared a meal with a family from church one Sunday several years ago. They had, at the time, a two year old boy. He didn’t want to sit in his highchair at the table and was throwing a fit. Instead of giving in to his screaming his Dad took him aside and talked to him until he calmed down. They came back to the table and he sat and ate in the highchair with no further issues. I remember the Father saying, “if it isn’t ok at home it isn’t ok here.” It was disruptive at the time, but looking back I think they made the best choice for their son. Remaining consistent was the most important thing in the situation, not making everyone comfortable, not allowing him to do whatever he wanted just because they weren’t at home, and most importantly remaining calm.

We are pretty lucky because Ian is a good little boy, who is mostly nice and mostly well behaved. Sometimes he gets a little overexcited about something and starts to get a little wild, but if we remain calm and get him to calm down I think we’ll be serving him well. We will hopefully be able to teach him how to regulate his emotions and how to react calmly to situations. Only time will tell.

Day 7,

I am seriously slacking on my 30 day gratitude challenge. I have to be honest. I have decided that I will continue it until I reach 30 days, no matter how long it takes me. I drastically underestimated the time it takes to blog. So here begins Day 7 -
I was reading a blog, Passionate Homemaking, and her post One Thousand Gifts: Learning to See and Name Every One. Many years ago I kept a gratitude journal. I believe it was Oprah who originally suggested it, and I did it when I was in high school and sometimes in college. Then this week, Becky Horst, my old adviser at Goshen College wrote this excellent Advent devotional. My Mom said she spent some intentional time saying what she is grateful for, at Becky's urging. I think it's an excellent practice to adopt in our daily lives. When I used to keep a gratitude journal I wrote 5 things I was thankful for every day, and they were as simple as my Dad's excellent dinner or getting a good grade on a test. I believe this practice opens our hearts to realize how much we have in our lives. It doesn't take much to think of five things each day, and the things that you think of will amaze you. I have to include a picture of the thing I'm most thankful for each and every day -

Day 6 – Giving the gift of hospitality

I am an introvert. My favorite thing to do on a Friday night is to go grocery shopping, eat pizza and watch Dateline, while playing Farmville. The last two happen after Ian falls asleep. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy spending time with people and sharing meals, but it exhausts me. So I need to learn balance for myself, and for my family. John is the opposite of me, he gets his energy from being with other people. What a dilemma! I have to admit that I win out more then he does. We really enjoy making food and sharing that food with others. Thankfully we also have my Mom around who is the queen of hospitality. She knows how to bring people together. I think it’s a great gift to teach your children also. That all that we have we should share with others – time, money, talents, food and friendship. I’m working on my introverted ways, but it’s not always easy.

Who wouldn't want to spend time with this guy?

Day 5 - Giving the Gift of Food

Our favorite recipes.

Here are the links to our favorite recipes from around the world wide web. This is really mostly for me so I can remember where to find them all. This first post includes a recipe from each of the main categories.

Breakfast
Whole Wheat Pumpkin Pancakes
Maple Oatmeal Muffins

Bread
Applesauce Bread
Honey Cornbread

Main Dishes
Garlic Chicken Pasta - sooo yummy, tastes even better with shrimp
Stuffed Pizza Rolls


Snacks
Chewy Granola Bars

Soups
Olive Garden Zuppa Toscana
Quinoa Chili
Baked Potato Soup - The best soup EVER

Cookies
Pumpkin Cookies w/ Maple Frosting
Sugar Cookies

Day 4 - Giving the gift of Generations

Ian's birthday is November 5th. Thankfully he was able to spend that day with all of his Grandparents. We had such a nice time together, with a wonderful meal cooked by John, and a fun time opening presents. Bob and Sara came out from Ohio to spend the week with us for Ian's birthday. It feels like such a blessing that they are able to do that for their Grandchildren. John and I each only have one grandparent left, John's Grandpa Bryson and my Grandma Blough. We love them very much, and enjoy spending time with them, however infrequently. Enjoy your Grandparents while you can.

Day 3 - Giving the gift of reading

I love to read. I don't always fit reading into my schedule, which is not a good thing. We have tons of books in the house, and a lot of kid's books for Ian to pick through. They're under the TV (don't know if that negates some of their good qualities or not). We spend time each day reading, and Ian can always choose to look at books if he wants to. I have always loved libraries. My parents took me as a young child, and I plan on extending the love of libraries to Ian.

There has been some interesting research lately - especially interesting is this article from Salon.com, which says "Children with as few as 25 books in the family household completed on average two more years of schooling than children raised in homes without any books." Obviously actually reading the books helps, but research has shown that just having books around helps your child's success.

This past Thursday was my Dad's birthday. It was the 3rd birthday since he's been gone. A family friend was killed in an accident last week, and I couldn't help but think of my Dad. He was the BEST reader. He read all the time. As long as I can remember. Not only did he read for himself, but he read to us. My most favorite memories are of my Dad reading to me.

I wrote this on Thursday -
Today

my heart is broken,
but not for you.
my wild boy kisses my forehead with his,
and washes my feet when they're dirty.
and the sunrise was beautiful today
and the mountains have snow
and i can't help but think that
you're the only one who would know what
to say right now
before the pain will burst us all wide open.

sometimes life is a little too much for me

and then he climbs in our chair for a story
and you come rushing back
and i know that this is the miracle
and we'll be ok

Day 2 - Give of your time, VOTE

Maybe this should have been yesterday's post, but this being the election day I think it's important to view voting as giving of your time. I will be voting this afternoon (somehow missed out on the whole mail-in ballot thing). I will go with my cheat sheet in hand, having done all the research to prepare.

We can sometimes get caught up in all the negative rhetoric from media and political ads, and forget that we are voting for issues and people because it's our right to do so. The 19th Amendment, Women's Suffrage, was ratified in 1920. There is fascinating history surrounding Women's Suffrage - Susan B Anthony's fight for the right to vote, to Woodrow Wilson's change or heart regarding suffrage. We have to pay homage to the warrior women who got us where we are today.

30 Day Giving Challenge

This month John, Ian and I are going to join in the 30 Day Giving Challenge

To see more information, click on the button.
Day One
Now he who supplies seed to the sower and bread for food will also supply and increase your store of seed and will enlarge the harvest of your righteousness. You will be made rich in every way so that you can be generous on every occasion, and through us your generosity will result in thanksgiving to God. 2 Corinthians 9:10-11

I would like to start by talking about an organization that I have supported for several years now, Women for Women International. From their web-site -
Our Theory of Change: Women for Women International believes that when women are well, sustain an income, are decision-makers, and have strong social networks and safety-nets, they are in a much stronger position to advocate for their rights. This philosophy and our commitment to local leadership builds change and capacity at the grassroots level.

I have been matched with several women, three from Bosnia, and one from Afghanistan. Again from their web-site -

Each country’s program varies due to economic, political, cultural and religious factors. However, in all countries where we work, your monthly support ensures that your sister receives the following tools and support over the course of her one-year participation:

• Direct aid on a monthly basis in cash.
• Emotional support and encouragement from her trainers, fellow participants and from you, her sponsor.
• Training on leadership, rights awareness and the role of women in society.
• Job skills training applicable to the local economy.
• A network of women to connect with in her community.
• Small business assistance and in some countries Microcedit.
• Access to a variety of other programs, depending on the country or region where your sister lives. These include, for example, literacy training in Kosovo, HIV/AIDS awareness and prevention training in Nigeria, savings and investment counseling in Rwanda and infant care classes in Afghanistan.

It is very little monetarily, but I have had the opportunity to share letters with the women I sponsor. We are so blessed to live in a country where we have opportunities, and doing the work of peace and justice in the world sometimes means helping women right where they are. I'm happy to be able to help in this way.

I hope to be able to keep this up for the full 30 days. It will coincide with my every day of November thankfulness status updates on Facebook, which I did last year and loved so very much.

time for an update

It's long past time for an update. We have been doing some fun things this Fall. The first few pictures are of our highly intelligent little boy reading his chapter books. He also wanted to wear Daddy's boots, always cute. I have pictures of me wearing my Daddy's boots when I was Ian's age.



We went to the Refuge Roundup at the Rocky Mountain Arsenal. It was fun.


Ian loves "choo-choos" so we road the light rail into downtown Denver. My sweet boy had so much fun.





Delo and Christina think he looks like an orphan child in the last picture. I say, at least we're feeding him. :)
I can't believe this guy will be 2 in less then a week.

Ian at School

Silly

Untitled from Bethany Simpson on Vimeo.

Broncos and a Boy

Thanks to Hassan, John and I got to go to the Bronco's home opener last Sunday. Besides the fact that it was 96 in Denver and we were sitting in the sun, we had a great time. The Bronco's beat the Seahawks and we saw John Elway. His box was right behind us. Pretty sweet. John says he looks huge and old.

John's big day - and Ian is happy

Book List - Updated

1. The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society – Mary Ann Sheffer
Read and really liked. It was a quick and easy read.
2. The Unnamed – Joshua Ferris
Tried to read and I hated it.
3. Run – Ann Patchett
This was a really good book. Not much else to say about it.
4. Mennonite in a Little Black Dress: A Memoir of Going Home – Rhoda Janzen
Hate. I can't say enough times how much I hated it. I like the reviews and discussions here -
http://100memoirs.wordpress.com/2010/03/18/laughing-out-loud-mennonite-in-a-little-black-dress/
5. The Lacuna – Barbara Kingsolver
I could probably write about this book a lot. You have to pay attention to every single word. It is a beautiful story of an American boy who grows up in Mexico. There are so many themes and stories - communism, his friendship with Frida Kahlo, WWII, etc.
6. The Year of Living Biblically: One Man’s Humble Quest to Follow the Bible as Literally as Possible – AJ Jacobs
I'm reading this book now and so far I love it. It is very interesting and funny.
7. Last Night in Twisted River – John Irving
Oh how I love John Irving. Here is the best line from this amazing story -
"We don't always have a choice how we get to know one another. Sometimes, people fall into our lives cleanly--as if out of the sky, or as if there were a direct flight from Heaven to Earth--the same sudden way we lose people, who once seemed they would always be part of our lives"
8. Bite Me: A Love Story by Christopher Moore
9. You Suck: A Love Story by Christopher Moore
10. A Dirty Job by Christopher Moore

And because I know most people really only want to see Ian, here are a few pictures of that guy -

Operation Ohio Surprise

On Friday I surprised John in Ohio. He didn't think I was coming, but he was wrong. I told Ian, and thankfully he kept the secret. Here is John's face right after I said "SURPRISE!"

i'll see you next time around

"If I should go by in the wink of an eye
Do not worry for me where I'm bound
Beginnings and endings are only pretendings
I'll see you next time around."

Monday Funny

The great white North

This batch is from our first few days in Alaska. We drove from Anchorage to Kenai and the drive is amazing. On the way is the Alaska Wildlife Conservation Center. They have black and brown bears, reindeer, moose, porcupines, bison (did you know there are no buffalo in N. America, except maybe at the zoo. They have never been buffalo - our elementary teachers lied), eagles, owls, musk ox, and elk. Ian enjoyed seeing the animals and getting out of the car. Then we arrived in Kenai where we stayed for the first half of our trip. We were hoping to see moose roaming the streets, but alas, they stayed away. We did see several along the side of the road. From Kenai you can see Mount Redoubt, an active volcano (which you can see in the distance in the picture of Ian and me). We ate at the coolest little cafe called Veronica's. I fell in love with Kenai when we were there. Next time - Seward and the Kenai Fjords Cruise.